To Truly Live

They are the ones coming out of the great tribulation. They washed their robes and made them white in the blood of the Lamb. For this reason they are before the throne of God, and they serve Him day and night in His sanctuary. The one seated on the throne will shelter them: no longer will they hunger; no longer will they thirst; no longer will the sun strike them, or any heat. Because the Lamb who is at the center of the throne will shepherd them; He will guide them to springs of living waters, and wipe away every tear from their eyes. 

Revelation 7:14-17

What a precious promise! These words are not meant to merely encourage us with what to expect after this life; they're meant to encourage us now with things we can experience while we're living here. We need every bit of encouragement we can get while we're here, to motivate us to keep pressing forward in a good race. Thankfully God is full of encouragement that never expires. 

He invites us to draw near now and always! We have full access to the throne as priests right now and the changes He makes within us are proof! He provides direction, nourishment and provision for us in the present, not just in the future. He give us thirsts and hungers and satisfies many of them in this life even as He making our hearts appropriate for the next. He is our refuge and brings peace even in the worst storms in this life, and we don't have to wait until we get to heaven to experience His comfort and peace. 

We won't see any this if we are living life only in the flesh. We'll just dismiss this as impossible. When we we see only with our human eyes and think only with human logic, our vision is significantly narrowed.  We aren't called to "just get through" this life so we can be rewarded later; we can experience more of God and His rewards as we walk these journeys with Jesus in this life. Jesus brings us into our purposes and callings. Jesus helps us to make the most of our time here- free and empowered. 

Revelation 5:9-10 says, "You were slaughtered and you redeemed the people for God by your blood from every tribe and language and people and nation. You made them a kingdom and priests to our God, and they will reign on earth." 

Beloved, we have been given a kingdom to look after- the world we live in. Our calling is to influence the culture and care for the citizens as Jesus did. We don't have to and shouldn't be sulking around like we're losing impact. The truth is - we have impact because Jesus gives it to us when we follow Him. We don't influence others in a godly way by pushing people away and choosing who we let in, but by accepting and loving people right where they are because that's what Jesus did! I think we sometimes have this idea that He will punish us for loving "the wrong people". But loving is what we're called to do. We are called to show the world His "impossible" love by reaching out, loving unconditionally and never usurping someone's choice.

Let's stop living like we just want to get done with life; our time here is a gift. We get to partake in leading and influencing others Jesus-style. There is no greater honor than to live a life like His and to be able impact people to move closer to the Healer. Enjoy this life by loving others and living courageously. Enjoy the things you once thought were found only in heaven right now and right here on earth. 

A Deeper Deliverance

19 Then they cried out to the Lord in their trouble;
He saved them out of their distresses.
20 He sent His word and healed them,
And delivered them from their destructions.
21 Let them give thanks to the Lord for His lovingkindness,
And for His wonders to the sons of men! 

Psalm 107:19-21

I sat at the table listening to my son voice his heartbreak. "I don't understand why she is mean to me, Mom. I do these nice things for her and she still doesn't like me." And I knew exactly how he felt. I spent much of my life looking for affirmation and approval. But God has also been gracious enough to me to teach me truths on this matter that I still have to consciously practice. It broke my heart for him that he was struggling with these things. But in order for him to be stronger, wiser and to keep loving courageously, he needed me to teach him some truths. He also had to accept them in his own heart and mind for himself. 

While talking to my son, I was reminded that although I've come this far, I have quite a ways to go. We are all at different points, but none of us have arrived. After he left the room I found myself praying, "Lord, make us all well. We need you to continually make us well." 

God heals - we know that right? But many of us have rarely experienced the healing we're seeking- healing from physical ailments and disease. Cancer and disease are excruciating and these bodies are dealt many sufferings. But even when we're healed physically from those diseases and ailments, we have a tendency to live like the same ol' person. We have the same destructive and selfish mindsets that keep us miserable deep down. It is good to want physical healing, but there are also deeper things that need to be touched within us than those things that ache the flesh. 

We are rarely so desperate as to pray for healing for our faulty mindsets and impure hearts. We yearn to live, but rarely put forth the same amount effort into living a joyous life that we put in to seeking physical healing and obtaining stuff. We make up our minds on issues based on our own biases, and we wonder why we spend so much of our lives in anger, resentment and misery. Those things we ignore and excuse away in ourselves are the very things that keep us bound. They are the emotional and spiritual blindfolds that we refuse to take off.   

His way is not like ours. He wants what is truly best for us, and what is best for us is something we rarely know the answer to. That is why we need Him. We need Him to continually walk with us and make us well. We need for Him to show us the right way, but we have to be willing to learn. We have a lot of junk in there that needs to be dealt with, but unless we walk with Him, we'll never know how. 

A Courageous Calling

There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love. I John 4:18

 

For years I had these dreams of being held hostage. The dreams would bring out the fear inside and impact me for days sometimes, but I never realized that the Lord may be showing me something about the state of my own heart. I brushed the dreams off as a weird coincidence because I didn’t know any better.  You see, I dismissed all things “charismatic” as showy and strange: therefore I dismissed a lot of things God was saying to me about over the years. If it seemed illogical or made me feel weird or uncomfortable in any way, I avoided it. Hence, my life reflected fear and bondage for so long. I will turn 40 this year, and it wasn’t until the past few years that I have been giving the ways of God more relevance in my life, willing to see and understand things differently than I once did. 

 

So, now, let’s get back to my dream.

 

A few months ago, I was having supper with two of my friends after God’s own heart. They were discussing their own dreams and their meanings and then one used the term “theme dream”. Because I trust these two women and because they have both taught me so much about the Lord already, I was open to hearing more. I felt compelled to share my dream with them. Neither of them told me what it meant, but assured me it had a spiritual meaning. Both of these dear ladies encouraged me to seek the Lord’s message in it. And so I did.  

 

As I sought the meaning of these dreams, the Lord showed me that the fear was symbolic of the state of my heart. And my being held hostage was symbolic of how I saw myself helpless and stuck. I was afraid to do so many things, afraid to be me, afraid to reach out, afraid to be vulnerable and love like Jesus. Fear had led my life for so long that I naturally made decisions out of fear. I kept people at bay and I tried to “fix” those closest to me. I did everything I could to make their lives comfortable so that they would love me. I was afraid to take risks and because of the fear, I didn’t enjoy life. I was codependent. But I didn't see these things in myself until a fee years ago. 

 

Last night, I had another one of these theme dreams. My family and I were being held hostage, but this time some family members were murdered in the process. There were even more villains. Sounds scary huh? I had plenty of reasons to be afraid, but despite the circumstances, I reacted out of courage. The rest of my dream was spent taking risks, coming out in the open and trying to find ways to get us free. I didn’t stop trying no matter what obstacles I came across. The dream ended before we were finally free and at first thought seemed like just another odd dream. But then I heard the Lord say, “Did you notice that you weren’t afraid? You were courageous.” BAM, He made the connection for me, showing me that He is teaching me to live in the freedom He has called me into. I didn’t hide behind walls and I actually did something, unlike in my previous dreams.

 

Isn’t it just like our God, to be so kind as to pull us forward? When we draw near to Him and begin truly following Him, He puts yearnings in our hearts to break free and overcome our fears. And He offers plenty of opportunities for us to conquer them by facing them head-on. He loves us too much to let fear cripple us. He calls us to get up and walk, to live every day fully, to keep moving forward and to tell others of His miracles. He calls us out of the boat and into some deep places.

 

For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind. 

2 Timothy 1:7

 

Fear does not come from God. I think it’s important that we recognize that as an important truth upon which to build our foundation. And so, it’s important to be aware of our feelings and senses so that we can call things what they are and move forward in freedom. Freedom requires some kind of fight, but God will give us the provision of strength. We have to start by believing Him. 

 

Purely Broken

What are broken things, if not things for God to heal?

What are challenges, if not opportunities to grow?

What are valleys, if not proof that there are mountains?

 

I am a verbal processor. Talking things out helps me to understand what I’m feeling and what’s happening around me. During a recent conversation with someone I love, I saw in myself a sense of fear towards him. It had been there for quite some time and I had plenty of reasons for it. But that fear had affected my ability to love like Christ; it drew me into hiding, not into light. And honestly, I forgot that it was there. By staying in that place I wasn't allowing room for the person and the relationship to grow, which are things I have long prayed for. And the Holy Spirit said to me, “If it weren’t for broken things, you would never know my endless ability to heal anything.” 

 

He is so right! The biggest challenges in my life have been the things God has used to draw me closer and pull down my walls. They are things He has inevitably used to change my heart and mend my wounds. It's sort of strange, isn't it, that something that is so painful can also be healing. The hardest moments have become the ones where I find myself closest to Him, loved unconditionally and absolutely safe with His Spirit. They have led to better sight and a cleaner heart - but not without some hard work and humility. I needed, and still do, to have my thought system challenged and my true heart revealed. There are so many things in the human heart that get buried over the years, and they don't all get uncovered overnight. 

That’s the beauty of this journey we get to take with Jesus – we’re never stuck. We don’t have to live in bondage to the things that are killing our Spirits. And we don't have to claim our worst traits as our identity. We get to keep moving forward in freedom, freedom to change without all the heavy junk and excuses we make. 

When we stop pointing fingers and making excuses, we're in the best position for change - surrender. Our calling, as believers, is continual growth that makes our hearts cleaner and our love more like His. His words to me recently say it best, " Those who do not think they need change need it most."