About The Church

I’m not a dreamer; I can’t say I have had very many dreams where I just know God was the originator and was teaching me something. But couple of weeks ago I had this dream that I couldn’t shake. It was one of those rare dreams that I just knew God had a message in. At first, I thought it was just for me, but upon waiting and further examination I realized the message was intended for a much broader audience- the church.

 

In the dream, I was cleaning house when someone called a loved one, and since he was no where to be found, left a voice message on his cell phone. I could actually hear the "friend" speaking as if it was on an old answering machine. She said something like, " Hey, don't tell Jennifer about how she offended me. She doesn't need to know. We will talk about it more later."  

I spent most of the dream trying to find out what I did wrong so I could make it right but neither she nor the circle she confided in would tell me, and they were all mutual friends and loved ones. She had grown a circle of enablers who treated this matter as though they were protecting her by not allowing me to know, hence not allowing me to make it right. These people defended her lack of courage by saying they just wanted to keep the peace, but then they continued to talk about it amongst themselves. The peace was already disrupted and distance and division had already set in. 

 

The very next day, as I listened to my pastor speak about the goals and vision for the church we attend, it became clear that this was a message about relationships. It was a message reinforcing that the way to accomplish the tasks set before us is to start with healthy relationships inside the church. It is then that we can have healthy relationships outside the church and make the greatest impacts.  

Scripture says: 

“If your brother sins against you, go and tell him his fault, between you and him alone. If he listens to you, you have gained your brother." Matthew 18:15 "So if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother has something against you,eave your gift there before the altar and go. First be reconciled to your brother, and then come and offer your gift." Matthew 5:23-24 

We need people who will come to us with love and courage and tell us what we need to hear, not necessarily what feels good. We need to be those people. We are called to help one another by speaking into each other's lives. We do that through encouragement and affirmation  as well as saying the hard stuff in love. Every one of us needs people around us who will speak up with edification and encouragement and we need to welcome it. 

We need to be willing to sit in both seats in order to grow. Hearing the hard stuff is never fun and when you're the one saying it, it's heart wrenching. People who love each other don't want to bring pain, but pain is inevitable in this life. Perhaps hearing the hard stuff from people who love us and who have the right motives is the best kind of pain. Gaining perspective and being willing to see ourselves through the eyes of others keeps us humble and forms a closer bond within those relationships. 

Relationships don't grow by holding in our hurts and offenses and it doesn't keep the peace. It's an illusion of peace; it's division.  And when we refuse to step up or listen to the perspective and observations of others, we refuse growth for ourselves and others. God wants us, as a community to have good relationships that exercise the insights and words of one another.